D for Diet

People have beliefs. Few people believe that Santa Claus is real. Few people believe that rainbows are unicorn’s poop. George Mallory had the belief that he could climb Everest ‘because it’s there’. Some believe that Game of Thrones is the best series ever made. To each, his own.
I also, very sincerely, hold a belief. It states:
Starting a diet is like going to university. You spend money to get the ‘good stuff’ and have nothing to show for it. You fail miserably and at the end you are still the same stout being with almost no will to live. But it’s important. It’s important because we all like existing with the illusion that we are trying.

Having said that, I think every individual in his or her lifetime should try to go on a diet. Not because they need it, but because they need to taste sweet failure. Like any other normal human being, I have also tried this sweet sweet escape from mundane life of eating and just being happy. In fact, I have tried it so many times that I think I am qualified to write a ‘How to diet’ post, just like I was qualified to write the following when-

-I declared myself to be a chiropractor because I once injured my ankle;

-I announced myself to be the most social person on earth because I managed to hold a 43 seconds conversation while maintaining eye contact with someone I had just met

Without delay, lets get started.

1. Shakes:
I think this is the most common element to begin a diet with, something that will keep you energetic throughout the day and prevent you from getting dehydrated or weak. I have a recipe that helps me kick start the process.



Melt a bar of chocolate and get some cookies. It’s better to take dark chocolate because it’s rich in fibre, iron, magnesium, copper, manganese and a few other minerals. Then add milk to it as we definitely need and want the calcium.


You have to mix it well to get an amazing shake. You can also add a little bit of chocolate syrup too because why not?

Cons of this drink are:
-it doesn’t really help you lose weight;
-on the contrary you might add a few pounds if you drink it regularly;
-sugar rush.

Benefit of this drink is:
-it will make you happy and your happiness is all that matters.

2. Pills:
Now many may view this as an unhealthy option but personally, it has helped me a lot. The ones I use are made by Mars, Incorporated and are called M&M’s. They are easily available at outlets. You may also order it on amazon too!


A bowl full of this will do the trick. But if you have trouble munching so many of these tablets, you can use orange juice to gulp it down.
(They come in various varieties so you get  options. Check for nuts, if allergic).

3. Go out:
Now all this is useless if you don’t go out for walks or a healthy run and if are at it, might as well go out for a light brunch, lunch or dinner, which might include:

You can go for a chicken steak with lots of potatoes on the side because potatoes are low in calories — a medium-sized baked potato contains only about 110 calories. They are a good source of vitamins C and B6, manganese, phosphorus, niacin and pantothenic acid.

IMG_7125Make sure to add a lot of vegetables too.

Now that we are already out, spaghetti is a good option as there are 220 calories in 1 cup of cooked Spaghetti. The more you know, the better it is.

Adding milk based product on baked salmon is also VERY helpful.

Did I mention chicken is as great as potatoes and other neglected vegetables?

I also understand that at times you might not feel like going out- so there’s an alternative for that- Order food at home.
It’s really easy and flexible like that.

Adding carrots to the diet can do wonders!
You can start by eating this.


Having imparted this vast gallery of knowledge, I would just like to add:

It may seem difficult, this task. It’s daunting, daring and seemingly dangerous, yet the results will be dazzling. This delightfully decent design will put you out of your dilemma and help you to live a delicious life. Some people might be demoralizing and demotivating but always remember that the decision is yours. As my favorite Diana said, ‘You can’t just sit there and wait for people to give you that golden dream. You’ve got to get out there and make it happen for yourself. It takes time to be a diva!’

Note- I have tried to make this as easy as possible keeping in view the need:
-for the human body to feel healthy, physically and mentally, so as not to feel pressured by the societal norms that dictate the necessity to appeal to their degrading judgements as to how one should look, and
-to eat whatever the fuck you want.

Thank you.




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